Ah, love. We’ve all seen it, felt it, lived it; most of us would probably have a good story or two to tell if we talk about love. No one can deny the rush of feelings that the first few weeks of being a couple gives, and every new couple is guilty of the things we’re about to tell you: Don’t tell us you’re not! Here are 19 things all new couples are guilty of.
1) Goodbyes take up to 2 hours since no one wants to hang up.
“No, you hang up first.”
“No, you hang up first.”
2) Politeness becomes second nature, even if you were the world’s biggest asshole before.
*holds open door for half the restaurant during a dinner date*
“Aww, you’re so polite, baby!”
3) You take more time getting ready to meet them than you did getting ready for prom night.
My lipstick just isn’t red enough!
4) Saying things as nicely as possible so you don’t screw it up.
“So I was thinking, maybe you’d like to go out to dinner, if that’s okay with you? And then maybe you wanna see a movie after, that’s cool too, if you want…”
5) Pooping? Peeing? Farting? Nope, no one does that, do they?
*farts* “Oh, what is that horrendous smell? Perhaps the people next door? Whoever could it be?”
6) You can’t even fall asleep next to them cause you’re scared you might snore, talk, or sleepwalk.
And you try with all your might to not move a single inch because they might wake up.
7) Your phone never stops buzzing because of all the message alerts.
But seriously, how do you guys keep finding stuff to talk about?
8) Showers become a twice-daily habit.
You gotta make sure to get even the tiniest cracks squeaky clean.
9) You even marked down the first day you guys talked.
Your first date, your first kiss, first time you held hands…
10) Oh, and all your friends already know. Because you told them. Repeatedly.
“Hey Shawndra, how’s it been? I got a boyfriend now. Hey, Shaniqua, how’s it been? I got a boyfriend now. Hey, Lamar,…”
11) Your Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn, Google+, and MySpace is filled to the brim of your selfies with them.
“LOOK WORLD I HAVE SIGNIFICANT OTHER”
12) You never make plans on weekends so you can be with them if they suddenly ask you out.
You’re practically invisible by 5:00pm, Friday.
13. When you do have plans, you end up talking to your SO to whoever you’re with.
Your friends start bringing headphones whenever you meet.
14. HHTS-Holding Hands Till Sweaty
It’s gotten to the point where you’ve gotten SO good at using your other hand.
15. Your good night texts are so well-written that you take an hour to write them
By the time you finish, they’ll be sleeping and they’ll only get to read your message in the morning anyway. Kinda misses the point.
16. You keep planning surprises for your SO; even with the most random things.
Like showing up unannounced at 3am with a Big Mac.
17. You’d tell them how much you like them in the middle of your afternoon dump, even.
“hai bb ilu so much”
“ilu 2 bb wru”
“poopin bae ily so muchhhhhhhhhhhhhh!”
18. You pull the most obscure topics out of your nose just to keep the conversation going.
“So… about them beavers, huh…”
19. It’s only been a short stint, but you already cannot imagine living without them.