Contrary to popular belief, the extremely charismatic are not perfect. Moreover, their charm does not come from their superior looks, skills, or income. To learn more about the habits of the extremely charismatic (and maybe be one), read on.
#1 Recognize that other people are important.
Since you already know yourself, your opinions, your perspectives, etc., you do not need to brag about yourself, as you can’t learn anything more about you (no matter how many useless facts you have in your head). But you don’t know what other people know, their opinions, and the like. This makes them more important to you because you can learn from them, Being genuinely interested in others make you utterly charming.
#2 Choose your words.
Know that the words you use affect others. Remember, you do not have to present in a meeting, you get to share new stuff with other people. You do not have to go to a meeting, you get to meet other people. People want to associate themselves with enthusiastic and happy people, so choose your words well to make people feel better about themselves. For sure, you’ll feel better about yourself too!
#3 Don’t hide your imperfections.
Imperfections or vulnerabilities humanize a person and therefore can increase your influence. For example, whenever you admit to a weakness, others can connect to you and hence you can become more likeable. So don’t hide your imperfections, in fact, embrace them! Do not act impressive, perfect, or superior. Learn to be truly yourself!
#4 Admit to your failings.
Following #3, to become really charismatic, you have to be truly genuine. So be humble, share your shortcomings, and admit to your mistakes. Always know how to laugh at yourself. People will like you better for it and would want to be with you more.
#5 Suppress the need to always talk.
The charismatic know how to listen and to listen very well. Keep the 2:1 ratio of listening to speaking. A way to do this is to ask a lot of clarificatory questions. So, instead of just talking about the surface, dig a little deeper by asking follow-up questions and examples. This improves your understanding of each other and increases your connection.
#6 Hear everyone and everything.
In other words, do not practice selective hearing. There are people, unfortunately, who find that hearing things said by other people are beneath them. Extremely charismatic people listen to everyone closely, regardless of their level or status, because at the end of it all, they know we are all the same!
#7 Speak well of others.
Remember, according to the scientific principle of spontaneous trait transference, when you speak bad of others, people can’t help but associate those traits with you. So this is a good reason not to gossip. Instead, speak well of others. Find someone that you know and genuinely share their great qualities with others.
#8 Give before you receive.
The charming never think about what they can receive whenever they give, but focuses on what they can provide others.
#9 Use your hands.
Hands are actually trust indicators. Charismatic people keep their hands visible and even use them to emphasize their words.
#10 Be humble.
Do not act self-important. People who are impressed with pretentious, stuffy, self-important stuff are pretentious, stuffy, and self-important people. Most of the population will not be impressed. They will actually get irritated and put-off.
#11 Gaze into their eyes.
Studies have shown that people who deeply gaze into people’s eyes by noting their blink rate or eye color have stronger connections with people. So whenever you are with someone, put your other stuff away. Don’t put your phone on the table, don’t hold your phone in your hand, etc.
#12 Stay positive.
Those who are really charming have a positive mental attitude that are not only seen, but also felt, by others.
#13 Speak in a confident and friendly tone.
The really good communicators out there speak confidently and deliberately, with a friendly tone. This gives their voice a very pleasing sound.
#14 Maintain your composure in whatever circumstance.
You can give people a poor impression of you whenever you overreact to something positive or negative. Silence may be more effective than angry words.
#15 Be patient.
Note that you have to give your actions and words time to create a big impact. This is a huge leg up over people who are impatient.